{"id":717685,"date":"2020-08-04T22:28:30","date_gmt":"2020-08-05T02:28:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/churchanswers.com\/?p=717685"},"modified":"2020-08-04T22:28:30","modified_gmt":"2020-08-05T02:28:30","slug":"telling-the-difference-between-breaking-trust-and-making-a-mistake","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/churchanswers.com\/blog\/telling-the-difference-between-breaking-trust-and-making-a-mistake\/","title":{"rendered":"Telling the Difference Between Breaking Trust and Making a Mistake"},"content":{"rendered":"

Leaders fail when they accuse someone of breaking trust when all the person did was make an honest mistake. It\u2019s demoralizing for the accused. Leaders also fail when they dismiss betrayal, thinking that betrayer was simply mistaken. That\u2019s dangerous for the leader.<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019ve made mistakes as a leader. One in particular stands out. The pre-filled-peel-and-partake communion cups were a mistake. I thought they would make the Lord\u2019s Supper process more efficient. Apparently, no one cares about efficiency in worship when the communion cups randomly explode after being exposed to freezing weather during the shipping process. After a few years, I can laugh about it. No one laughed then.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Leaders make mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes occur for many reasons: laziness, stubbornness, misinformation, miscalculations, and ineptitude. Even the most competent of people, however, make honest mistakes, like when communion cups become grape juice grenades.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Making a mistake is different than breaking trust\u2014qualitatively different. Breaking trust is never appropriate. Breaking trust is a form of betrayal. It\u2019s one thing for communion cups to explode. It\u2019s another thing to work behind the scenes to undermine or deceive a friend. The mistake stains clothes. The betrayal stains a soul.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Your team will make mistakes. You should <\/span>expect<\/span><\/i> others to make mistakes. In fact, you should give your team the <\/span>freedom<\/span><\/i> to make mistakes. But you should also maintain zero tolerance for a betrayal of trust. As a church leader, how can you tell the difference between a mistake and betrayal?<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Ask before jumping to conclusions<\/b>. If you believe someone has made a major mistake that could rise to the level of breaking trust, then your first step is to talk to the individual. Too often leaders jump to conclusions without hearing the other side. Too often this leap is due to the leader\u2019s own insecurities.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t micro-analyze every mistake<\/b>. If insecure leaders jump to conclusions, overbearing leaders will micro-analyze everyone\u2019s mistakes. When someone on your team makes an honest mistake, move on. Good team members will learn from their own mistakes. Splitting hairs creates splitting headaches.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t project past offenses on others<\/b>. Someone from your past betrayed you. Just because another person has a similar personality doesn\u2019t mean he or she will betray you too. You should not project someone\u2019s past offenses on another person.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Look for a pattern<\/b>. A few mistakes every now and then is normal. Making the same mistake multiple times after multiple warnings is a pattern you cannot ignore.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Consider the intent<\/b>.<\/span> When someone breaks your trust, intent exists. When someone makes a mistake, they don\u2019t intend to do so.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Consider the whole of a person<\/b>. No one wants to be judged by an isolated mistake. Even in the case of something substantial, consider the entirety of a person. All people make mistakes. In fact, all people have sin. As a leader, you must look at all of who a person is, not just who they are in a bad moment.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mistakes are inevitable. Leading change and taking risk will produce mistakes. Indeed, you can\u2019t move forward without incurring some mistakes. Your team will make mistakes too. Just don\u2019t mistake them for breaking trust.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Leaders make mistakes. Your team will make mistakes. You should expect others to make mistakes. In fact, you should give your team the freedom to make mistakes. But you should also maintain zero tolerance for a betrayal of trust. As a church leader, how can you tell the difference between a mistake and betrayal?\r\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":717686,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"publish_to_discourse":"0","publish_post_category":"1","wpdc_auto_publish_overridden":"","wpdc_topic_tags":"","wpdc_pin_topic":"","wpdc_pin_until":"","discourse_post_id":"","discourse_permalink":"","wpdc_publishing_response":"","wpdc_publishing_error":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[195],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-717685","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-conflict-and-people-problems"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nTelling the Difference Between Breaking Trust and Making a Mistake | Church Answers<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Leaders make mistakes. Your team will make mistakes. 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