{"id":843497,"date":"2025-01-13T05:00:23","date_gmt":"2025-01-13T11:00:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/churchanswers.com\/?p=843497"},"modified":"2025-01-10T12:25:00","modified_gmt":"2025-01-10T18:25:00","slug":"why-a-pastor-did-not-survive-a-difficult-church-an-interview","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/churchanswers.com\/blog\/why-a-pastor-did-not-survive-a-difficult-church-an-interview\/","title":{"rendered":"Why a Pastor Did Not Survive a Difficult Church: An Interview"},"content":{"rendered":"

There are great rewards in the pastoral call. And there are times that there is great pain. In this article, I have asked a pastor to share his experiences in a difficult church, one where he eventually left under pressure. I wrote the interview verbatim while allowing the pastor to remain anonymous.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Thom: As much as you feel comfortable, will you share with us the story of your church?<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pastor: <\/b>For starters, <\/span>every<\/span><\/i> church is a difficult church on some level.\u00a0 After all, they are filled with fallen sinners and led by fallen sinners!\u00a0 The situation that prompted me to agree to this interview was a situation in which I was called to lead a church that faced a number of challenges, some of which I was ill-equipped to lead them through, others which the congregation (from my perspective) was unwilling to address.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Like many churches, my situation was comprised of factionalism, resistance to change, too much debt, a history of conflict, divisiveness, and short pastoral tenure.\u00a0 Each of those issues presents a challenge to pastoral ministry and leadership.\u00a0 When they are coupled with other problems, they can be overwhelming.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

In addition to inheriting a church with a host of issues, I also inherited a church with tremendous administrative demands, which was a major area of weakness for me.\u00a0 My administrative shortcomings (which I have since addressed in significant ways) actually made my situation worse.\u00a0 I found it challenging to stay on top of issues, keep everyone informed of changes, cast vision, and motivate ministry teams to pull in the same direction in ministry in a church that size.\u00a0 In a typical church, I might have overcome those issues in time to grow into the pastor this church needed.\u00a0 Given the lack of general church health and specific challenges this church faced, my lack of administrative expertise proved to be a significant hurdle.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

In addition to my church’s history and my own shortcomings, there was one key event that produced more significant conflict within the church early in my tenure that seemed to solidify a couple of key groups in their opposition to my ministry.\u00a0 It was a church discipline issue that presented itself six weeks after I arrived at the church.\u00a0 This issue was not a minor case of disagreement, one in which I could bide my time and slowly bring the church along.\u00a0 It was a significant issue of sexual sin that was exposed in a very public way.\u00a0 To refuse to address it would have meant a blatant disregard for Scripture and would have given the appearance that our church condoned the actions of the individual in question.\u00a0 In calling our church to pray for the repentance of the individual in question (without naming the person) and discussing what would happen should the person not repent, I started a firestorm of controversy and complaints that lasted until the day I left (I literally received email complaints about my handling of the situation four years after the fact).\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

This church had never discussed church discipline in her history, a fact confirmed by many longstanding members.\u00a0 The shock of such a discussion apparently encouraged several influential members to dig in their heels in opposition to my ministry.\u00a0 One man personally voted \u201cno\u201d for every item that came up in a business meeting after that event just to make a point.\u00a0 Another member told me he made a point to stand up and vote \u201cyes\u201d triumphantly in the very first business meeting after my departure!\u00a0 Another lady made a point of shouting, \u201cPraise God!\u201d when I announced my resignation from the pulpit.\u00a0 It was a challenging church, to say the least.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Thom: How long were you in this ministry when you discovered it would be a problematic church?<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pastor: <\/b>I discovered soon after I arrived that it was going to be a much more difficult church than I had imagined.\u00a0 When I was a candidate for this church, I was told by numerous individuals that it was a great church with tremendous potential and that it just needed a few programmatic tweaks before seeing some significant growth.\u00a0 Six weeks after I arrived, the unavoidable church discipline situation presented itself, which revealed just how many difficulties I would face.\u00a0 From that point forward, it never ceased to amaze me the lengths some folks would go to in an effort to criticize me over minor issues.\u00a0 <\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Thom: What are some of the signs that let you know it would be a challenging ministry?<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pastor: <\/b>This question is, unfortunately, too easy for me to answer.\u00a0 I have personally counseled scores of pastors in difficult situations.\u00a0 There is a common challenge that presents itself in these types of churches.\u00a0 A truly difficult church, in my opinion, is marked by factions that care more about their vision for the church than obedience to Scripture and individuals who will attack a pastor personally in an effort to protect their desired direction for the church.\u00a0 I know from personal experience that I am not the only pastor who has been falsely accused of issues in an effort to convince others it was time for a change in leadership.<\/span><\/p>\n

Thom: What was the final issue that caused you to resign?<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pastor: <\/b>It was not a single issue. The cumulative effect of many issues took its toll on my wife and me. It got to the point where I received opposition to anything I led or suggested. More and more church members began criticizing my sermons to the point where I was paranoid about saying almost anything.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Thom: What were some key lessons you learned from this difficult experience?<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pastor: <\/b>First, I needed to ask a lot more questions before I accepted the call to the church. I take part of the blame for my failure to learn about the challenges of this church. Second, I should have developed some key allies and supporters before tackling such a divisive issue. I knew I could not wait too long, but I really moved right into the problem without the support I needed. Finally, I know I did not pray enough during this time. I let my emotions control me rather than the Holy Spirit.<\/span><\/p>\n

Thom: Do you think you could have survived the church if you had heeded these lessons from the onset?<\/b>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Pastor: <\/b>Sadly, no. After we left, we heard from other members and pastors about the toxic nature of this church. The church was half its size within two years after we left. It’s been four years now, and I’ve heard from current and former members that they are considering closing the church. It is a sad story indeed.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

What do you think of this story? Do you have similar experiences? How can we help pastors who are going through such difficult times?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"There are great rewards in the pastoral call. And there are times that there is great pain. In this article, I have asked a pastor to share his experiences in a difficult church, one where he eventually left under pressure. I wrote the interview verbatim while allowing the pastor to remain anonymous.\u00a0 Thom: As much…","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":843499,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"publish_to_discourse":"0","publish_post_category":"1","wpdc_auto_publish_overridden":"","wpdc_topic_tags":"","wpdc_pin_topic":"","wpdc_pin_until":"","discourse_post_id":"","discourse_permalink":"","wpdc_publishing_response":"","wpdc_publishing_error":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[193,1,183,195,184,190,186,192,177,178,191,14796,180,194,176,196,185],"tags":[19853,20051,86,20052,19756],"class_list":["post-843497","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-administration-and-finance","category-church-answers","category-communications","category-conflict-and-people-problems","category-discipleship","category-family","category-health-and-metrics","category-how-to","category-lead","category-membership-and-assimilation","category-mind-body-and-spirit","category-monday-wednesday-featured","category-outreach-and-evangelism","category-preaching","category-revitalize","category-staff-and-organizational-issues","category-worship","tag-conflict","tag-difficult-church","tag-pastor","tag-pastoral-call","tag-resignation"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWhy a Pastor Did Not Survive a Difficult Church: An Interview | Church Answers<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"There are great rewards in the pastoral call. 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